When There is No Food
When your fridge suddenly becomes empty together with your pockets, there exists one easy salvation how to make a dinner even for ten persons. First of all you should go to the nearest forest and gather crayfishes there, or whatever, we don’t know where those Russians find those cancers. Their number should be enough to fill the bathroom. Here we have to notice, that the bathroom full of crabs (or what’s their name?) of course looks ridiculous but is the most important aspect in cooking, because if you are too tired or drunk or whatever again, and need to have an instant break, they will still be alive and fresh, swimming in your bathroom. But don’t fill it to the brim, these creatures are very sly and can easily get out, kill you while you are sleeping and move out to the forest. So be attentive and better barricade the door in the bath-room or barricade yourself to make sure. So have a good and safely rest, then wake up, take several packings of sour cream and pour it out in the bathroom! The crabs like the sour cream and will stain in it. This makes them more delicious. Don’t try to spread them with the sour cream by your own hands, it can be dangerous. After all wash them with a shower, fill the bathroom with clean water, and turn on the immersion heater. The dinner is ready. Of course, keep in mind that you will need about bucket of beer to eat all those crabs.
via exler
| Tags: bath-room, cancers, crabs, crayfishes, russian-way-of-cooking |
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first!
cheers!
that’s just awful!
I hate jews, muslims and christians! They are eating dead animals!
I hate you.
I love everyone on here.
I know. Thank you.
brakonery
Tak vkusno! No, davol’no trudno est! Slishkom khrustyashchie! A vkus divnoi!
Delicious!
I actually really miss crayfish. They aren’t often sold fresh in the UK as they are in Russia, and that is a great shame. I now tend to substitute them with lobsters, which actually taste quite similar but still aren’t as good as good old crayfish with beer. Yam yam
I walked out in my driveway several years ago and there was a crayfish(pronounced crawfish, crawdad, or crawdaddy). The thing is there were no creeks or streams around that I knew of.
You are being invaded by killer crayfish. Pack your bags and run for your life!
Come to think of it… he was kind of aggressive. The author of this blog must know something I don’t. I will have to sleep with one eye open now.
Also I hope they got all the hair out of that bath tub if you know what I am saying.
Perfect article!!! I laughed my ass off!!! After I read this article out loud with that special Borat accent all our company were down on the floor rolling!!! ROFL!!! :))
“we don’t know where those Russians find those cancers”, “swimming in your bathroom”, “can easily get out, kill you while you are sleeping and move out to the forest.” - That fckin rulz! :)))
LOL!
Pretty neat… you can also drink out of the toilet when you’re at it. :)))
A bathtub full of deliciousness! I don’t care how bad the author’s English is, I envy him, both for his tub full of crayfish and his ability to eat them. I am tragically allergic.
Boris , may i congratulate you: you have defeated orknexus;
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How is that?
Tell me more about it!
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Get this shit out of here. Nobody gives a fuck what you have to say, so it doesnt fucking matter if it’s really from you or not. Get rid of the pgp, or just dont say shit.
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FuckYouOrknexusYouAreABitch
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kiss my ass
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I want in this bathroom !
You don’t know what you want? IGOR IS THE BALDY FAG and you don’t know what you want in this bathroom???
LOL!! Move out to the forest!!!
I just vomited in my mouth a little…
Here in the US we eat them all the time. I am from Louisiana - we have crawfish boils - they are boiled with spices (very hot!), potatoes, small ears of corn, onions and lots of other things.
You’ll eat me out next sunday whether i’m bald or not.
Crayfish, crawfish, crawdads. Those things turn up everywhere. They’re like giant aquatic bugs.
Tasty, though.
In the US south, the gulf of Mexico coast, Lousiana, Mississippi, Alabama and, of course Texas they are frequently called mudbugs and prepared as you seem to and beer of course, not in the cooking, in us. The first boil is best, burns.
Delicious! Last time I ate it almost year ago. It’s really delicoious with both of beer bottlesюююШ hope I’ll eat it so soon
Чёж вы бляди понимаете в Русской кухни
Joke:
Wife of one guy went missing. After searching here duting one week policeman called this guy and told him:
-We have 3 news for you. One is really bad but other two can compensate it.
the guy replied: Ok, tell me the bad news first..
P: We found body of your wife in the river.
G: So what are good news then?
P: first is that we gathered a basket of crawfishes from her body and we invite you for some beer…
G: what is the second good news?
P: We placed the body of your wife back to the river, so tomorrow we can have another beer/crawfish party!
mate!.. those are bloody yabbys.. you throw the little suckers on the bbq, slice open and throw some lemon on them and they are good to go.. in australia we have those in every dam.. the lobster/crayfish are huge they are like the size of a small baby.. these things shown are just yabbys the size of your hand if your lucky..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common_yabby
Boiled crawfish are delicious!