61 8 Flies in the Balinese Ointment: A Russian’s Point of View

8 Flies in the Balinese Ointment: A Russian’s Point of View

Posted on November 30, 2009 by


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8 myths about Bali with effect of disclosure from Russians.

Myth #1: Bali is a paradise

Snorks! No, surely, each of us has his own paradise but there should be some average idea. Something like a beautiful small beach with no many people around, dense jungle behind, marvelous corals and a small village not far away. And it’s the picture that most expect to see in Bali. Snorks two times. Bali is a huge island resembling an anthill full of unattractive and obtrusive natives, ugliest Australians reeking of fish and carnation. Everything outside is muddy, stinking and usually homely.


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Myth #2: What a wonderful sea!

Despite the fact that Bali is an island surrounded by water from all sides, it’s quite problematic to bathe there. In Changu the waves are very heavy and are not recommended to come into. Someone may like it, but if you want to swim and not to be spread by a giant wave over the sand, you will hardly like such rest. The same sea is in Cuta plus a great plenty of crazy beginners with boards striving to land a blow on your head. Besides, the beaches are crowded with beggars and money-grubbers, so you can relax only at a swimming pool with chlorinated water. Lovina and Candidasa are renowned for turbid and dirty water and sudden stones, Nusa Dua – for tides, but probably, better beaches are there, in Nusa Dua, and in Sanur. Anyway solitude is possible only in the hotel room. Unwillingness of the islanders to make it all more comfortable is explained only by one thing – the superstition that the ocean is inhabited by evil spirits.

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61 Responses to “8 Flies in the Balinese Ointment: A Russian’s Point of View”

  1. Bijdehans says:

    Hmmm, very strange story. So you come from Russia to visit Bali and what do you expect? To not see grey skies, grey architecture, grey landscapes and grey people for once or to find 5 star hotels, 5 star food and 5 star treatment… I think not so long ago it would have been heaven for any Russian to visit green, lush, warm and friendly Bali but man did “we” get spoiled and all of the above is suddenly not enough anymore…

  2. Musa says:

    Fascinating post! :)

    • Kirov says:

      I can only say who-ever wrote this must be crazy. Bali is like heaven if you come from Russia!!!! I am from Astrakhan and hope to get a chance to go to Bali. Sofar only been to Berlin, which was stunning. Strakhan seemd grey and desolte after this vacation… imagine coming home from Bali!!!!

  3. are you kidding says:

    add a few gulags to bali and russian fit in

  4. Taupey says:

    LOL where else can you get an exotic grey tan instead of a common golden brown!

  5. real CZenda and not the impostor says:

    Been there, seen that. What I remember is a dustbin on the beach saying “Please, keep the place tidy” in English. Foreign tourists were throwing the trash into the dustbin. The locals were throwing the trash anywhere but into the dustbin :-)
    On the other hand, snorkeling at Gili Meno and trek at Mt. Rinjani were great, so the holidays were worth the money spent.
    Bemo is terrible and the local habit of spitting on its floor and thoughtfully stirring the spit with bare foot is extremely disgusting. Guess the best way to move around is to rent a scooter.

  6. beep beep beep says:

    It is. The only reason so many ugly australians go there is because it’s cheap, other than that it’s a dump.

  7. #Mr.Tinkles says:

    Really, NOTHING about the bombed train in this blog!?

  8. Jerika says:

    I think the flowers is the best picture on this site.

  9. StainlessSteelCynic says:

    I’m Australian and I have never been to Bali but I know many who have (including members of my family).
    The reason there are so many ugly Australians there (along with ugly Germans, Dutch and other Europeans) is that it is very cheap.
    In Australia, I could spend Au$700 to fly from Perth to Sydney (a distance of thousands of kilometres, one side of the country to the other) with no return ticket or accommodation. Or I could spend Au$700 for a return flight and a weeks accommodation in Bali. It is very cheap so all the ‘cheap’ Australians go there so they can claim they have been ‘overseas’

    • SSSR says:

      Dubai was very cheap before it transformed into the world famous extravagant mega city it is today.

      Maybe Bali will be competition for Dubai someday.Anything is possible!

    • just curious says:

      Is Bali fairly cheap to travel to for people in USA and Europe? Just curious.

      • Nick says:

        Dubai should be cheap, it is a total dump. The place smells horrible because of raw sewage being dumped into storm drains flows into the marina and onto the beach. It is miserably hot, hotter even than Las Vegas. The dust storms are horrible. The palm trees will all look dead in Dubai, but they are not dead, just covered in dirt. Poor unemployed former constructions workers will try to jump in front of your car, hoping that you will hit them and have to pay their family compensation. Dubai is also, actually very boring. Because of the Islamic culture it is impossible to have any good dirty fun like you can in other countries. Dubai is like Vegas without the fun.

  10. Jim says:

    This post did not come from Live Journal did it?

  11. Persse says:

    Better to holiday in Russia – drunk and horrible people and bad weather. I think not!

  12. mike says:

    When you travel, you expect to see a place that is different from what you are used to. Bali is what it is. I have travelled to a few places far from home and there is always something I could complain about, but if I really minded I would always stay home. Travel is an adventure. Sometimes the food or accomodations or local customs aren’t to your taste, but you travel to see something different, so it won’t do any good to complain.

  13. toe says:

    Magnitogorsk resort are the best in Russia!

  14. Taupey says:

    hmmm… If Bali does have both white and black sandy beaches, I wonder if that’s where L.E. Modesitt, Jr. got the idea for the Island of Recluse in his Saga Of Recluse?

  15. Bemo is terrible and the local habit of spitting on its floor and thoughtfully stirring the spit with bare foot is extremely disgusting. Guess the best way to move around is to rent a scooter.

  16. Mike Tamblyn says:

    Yeah, beaches in Bali are “full of beggars.”

    …and I’m surrrre Moscow or St. Petersburg isn’t….

  17. LameFox says:

    I’ve never heard of anyone going to the beaches there to relax, usually they just want to surf. I agree about the sun though, it’s better to be in places where it isn’t as strong, and not sunny often, but when it is you can go out in it. I live in a very sunny place but I spend more time in the sun in places like that, because here it just burns in a few minutes.

  18. Rosen says:

    Strange articles, im Indonesian and as far as i know it has everything cheaper than my neighbour country

  19. Joy says:

    And i still have enjoyed every last moment that i’ve spent on Bali island.

  20. mila says:

    excuse me but i think durians taste great!

  21. Aussie Legend says:

    LOL, you must be SO far from paradise you don’t know it when you see it. Australian people homely? Geez haven’t you been looking at the pictures of Russians on your own site??? Hahaha your women are hairier than your men!

  22. Regan says:

    kamu semua apakah belom ada yang pernah ke bali..
    aku sendiri orang indonesia gak pernah ke bali…

    hahahaha bagi aku. aku cuma mau ke russia…gak mau kemana-mana

    gara-gara indonesia bencana parah-parah
    longsor, hujan…

    haaa andaikan indonesia ibukotanya bali bukan jakarta…
    awkawkawkawkawk jakarta penuh dengan kebnjiran…

    peach from jakarta, indoneisa
    suprise with this posting… thx for posting this

    • Toma & Misha "same guy" says:

      Regan your words look as if you are singing a song.

    • ha ha ha says:

      the author should be sued!!! Tom yum is not from indonesia…its from thailand.. Thais, should demonstrate to protest this!! this is a national recipe plagiarism…
      Ha ha ha….

  23. golda says:

    Indonesia is a beautiful country..I love Indonesia!

  24. Johnny Non-Euro says:

    I’m Australian, and devilishly handsome at that. The author must be of a god-like sheen to pronounce others ‘ugly’, especially as scientists agree eastern European males have faces like bashed crabs and teeth like rotting stilts. The whole travel experience must have been quite traumatic, since it seems to have put him off his original goal of browning young lads, an activity that makes Bali quite a Euro-magnet, I hear. Better luck next time, old chap!

  25. Sherman says:

    More than a bit racist aren’t we? Not surprising though, coming from a country that assimilated several eastern countries by force and then treat them like second class citizens.

    For all your myth debunking, almost all of them are totally from a westerner’s warped view LOL.

    Your most obvious mistake: Durian

    OF COURSE Durian is tasteless when picked young. ROFL. It’s like picking oranges that are still green and expecting to know the taste of the actual ripe orange when eaten.

    Durian is NOT eaten immediately (Durians that are picked young are usually eaten as VEGETABLES, not fruit). Usually you let it ripen first after buying it. You will know by the smell when to eat it.

    The smell is also kind of a personal taste. Some people find it very very fragrant (like me), some people compare it to sewer smell (which I disagree with intensely). Something to do with pheromones I guess. The smell is overpowering, but for me, underneath the initial smell is a fragrant sweet smell that I just can not describe. Think of it like perfume. The musk is of course, unpleasant on it’s own, but when mixed with another fragrance, it serves as a carrier of the smell. That’s the way Durian works. It’s just that most people only smell the ‘musk’ and fail to detect the underlying smell.

    Durian is also simply delicious. Unlike anything on Earth. It’s a shame you didn’t eat it correctly. You could’ve at least tasted Durian candy (which has none of the overpowering smell) but the same flavor. Albeit without the custardy texture that makes the fresh fruit so delicious.

    I’m half-Filipino, half-Canadian and Bali is close enough to us. I wonder why foreigners always think they have a right to simply say ‘Ugly people! Homely Australians!’. As if they somehow expected that everyone out there should be flawlessly beautiful. Hah. Throwing stones from a glass house indeed. When our people do visit your countries, it’s the same impression, you are not very beautiful either. More so because a lot are so obese from all the greed and of course the disappointment fueled by the fact that given that Hollywood people are beautiful, we kinda expect y’all to look like them. But guess what, we don’t tell you about it in your face. Because it’s RUDE.

    Manners. Your collective momma didn’t teach you it.

  26. Lovely says:

    8 Flies in the Balinese Ointment: A Russian’s Point of View

  27. Sarkawi says:

    Durians taste great.. Still wondering if I can find durians in Russia..

  28. Demetrius says:

    Hey, I searched for this webpage on Bing and just wanted to say thank you for the fantastic learn. I would need to agree with it, thank you again!

  29. i always like to stay on 5 star hotels because the ameneties and the ambiance is always great *

  30. fikamar says:

    1. Bali is cheap, then the real is very expensive, hahahahaha you know it NOW??
    2. Monkeys are cute. yeah they’re cute, except they’re start to steal YOUR bag, sunglasses etc
    but I have a legend from Bali, if you being climbed by the monkey in Bali, you will got lucky (of course in the condition, you are brought nothing)
    3. Luwak coffee is tasteless? think again!! it so tastefull!! if you want to try the real Luwak coffee, then you should go to Sumatera Island. and the cost is very cheap, too!
    4. Durian are both hell? I’m sure you pick the durian when it still green. Pick the durian when it yellow, and I suggest you to pick durian at November. then the myth about durian is true

    Think again about these four. and the others that I mention above, I agree with the wrong myth.

  31. MWARD says:

    Basically go back to Russia if your not happy,,,, Basically tourists and overseas corporations are destroying Bali, thats the problem…. remember Bali and the Balinese are still a relatively new to Our Western Influences and the crap that comes with it…. Pollution, Influence of Money and the Greed that comes with it, etc etc…. Since I live in Bali and my wife is Balinese Iam worried for the Islands future. Hopefully the Fad wears off and people can move on before we destroy Bali the history, culture and way of life on the Island… Like what has happened in Thailand!!!

  32. Crowd Search Me says:

    Basically go back to Russia if your not happy,,,, Basically tourists and overseas corporations are destroying Bali, thats the problem…. remember Bali and the Balinese are still a relatively new to Our Western Influences and the crap that comes with it…. Pollution, Influence of Money and the Greed that comes with it, etc etc…. Since I live in Bali and my wife is Balinese Iam worried for the Islands future. Hopefully the Fad wears off and people can move on before we destroy Bali the history, culture and way of life on the Island… Like what has happened in Thailand!!!

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